I don't want to eat animals any more
I first started trying to be vegan 6 or 7 years ago because animal agriculture is extremely resource intense when compared to plant agriculture, and I want to minimize my contribution to climate change.
Animal welfare was always a side-benefit. Like it's nice that I'm also reducing my contributions to animal suffering.
But lately, my feelings are changing.
I've been thinking about animal subjugation. I don't really have moral qualms with hunting, as long as you eat what you kill. The deer gets to live its life and be free. The deer is not subjugated. The deer does not live a life of suffering.
But the cows and chickens do. From birth they are subjugated. They have no freedom, no will, no real life. They're forced into small spaces, crammed with many others like them. They survive in horrible conditions and are quite literally tortured.
Where I could justify eating a little bit of meat with regard to my climate concern - my footprint is still pretty low - this justification doesn't work with regard to suffering.
Yet I'm still eating meat. Today is Thanksgiving, and I will be eating chicken & rice soup. I will probably eat more animals (and their milk) tomorrow during my other Thanksgiving celebration.
I eat TV Dinners that have meat in them, and sometimes a turkey sandwich (I always want to spell it sandwhich) from the deli.
The lack of vegan options in my area is part of the problem. My mental limitations keep me from cooking consistently for myself, and my grocer's pre-made vegan options are very slim and very expensive. The restaurants are no better, not that I eat out much.
But I want to make the leap. I want to stop eating animals. They deserve to live good lives, to have joy, to experience love and kindness and warmth and freedom. Cows and chickens deserve it just as much as cats and dogs.
And dairy is no better. Dairy cows live a cruel, torturous life. The killing isn't really the problem for me. It's the cruelty and captivity.